Nature by the Drop Blending Lab

On Saturday, after my son's baseball game (his team won by the way -- tied all the way to the end. Final score was 6 to 5), I met my friend Holly over at our mutual friend's Veterinary Clininc to host this month's essential oil blending lab. We had invited all of our friend's clients with the intention to focus on the health and well-being of their pets and using essential oils to help with that. Well today only one person came to our blending lab. But it turned out so lovely; it became a one-on-one, three hour consultation for Deb (which gives me lots of new expanding ideas). This "private session" gave us the opportunity to get a bit more personal. We helped Deb create special healing blends for each person in her family (we ran out of time and did not get to make one for her dog, but she did get something pre-blended for her). ... A very nice afternoon! ... Then off I wen to the beach to pick my son up from a birthday party. My daughter spent the day with Grandma.

Cheers,
Julie

Nature by the Drop Blending Lab

Today Holly and I featured the essential oil of Lemon at our monthly blending lab. This is one of my favorite oils! I clean house with it. Just the other day I was removing the tape off window where I had painted the trim and the heat of the sunshine seemed to have "melted" the tape to the window in some areas. So I use two drops of oil on my hand and rubbed the area of he window where needed an d the razor I was using took right off! Yay! I also like to add a drop od essential oil of lemon to my water or tea (I only trust and ingest Young Living's essential oil of Lemon). There are many other uses for this oil. But this is what I do with it and love it! -- Blessing, Jules

March: Spiritual Book Club

I don’t’ think I have told you yet. Once a month I join four other lovely friends for a spiritual book club. We are on our third book now. We came together nearly a year ago and started with Eckhart Tolle’s book, A New Earth, Awaken to Your Life’s Purpose. I couldn’t put the book down and reread it three times! I even have the book on CD and would listen to certain chapters over and over again like a reference book. You know what? I’ll write book review on a later day, so be in touch.

The second book we read I did not like very much. I was the only one out of the five of us they felt this way, I think..

Now we are reading The Anatomy of the Spirit, The Seven Stages of Power and Healing by Caroline Myss, PH.D. I love this one too! It is all about taking full responsibility for our health, emotional and physical. She teaches how to manage our energy. When I am done with this book, I’ll write a book review on this one too! Keep you posted!

Blessings,

Jules

"A Healthy Divorce is Better Than an Unhealthy Marriage"

I had the opportunity to see and visit a girl friend I had not spent any time with in the last year and a half or so due to our busy lives. My friend Cindy was invited to come to the auction dinner that my kids’ school hosted by a mutual friend. Cindy, dear Cindy – love her! She works with my x-husband at the hospital and so it was through him that we have become friends over the years. She was disappointed to hear that I am divorcing. My friend Cindy was just so stuck on the idea that divorce negatively effects the children; I don’t remember the exact word she used – but says that no matter what, divorce damages children. Then went on to say that unless a relationship is abusive people should stay married (if there are children) … and she commented that she thinks too much like Laura Schlessinger.

Well, I just listened to her. Of course she would not hear me when I said my relationship was abusive – emotionally it was abusive (on another day I will recommend some books to read if you think you are in an emotional abusive relationship). But if you know my X and me, you too would be in disbelief to hear this and brush it off with a “Ya right” under your breath. It was not my goal in that moment or anytime for that matter to convince my friend of anything. I was just happy to see her and hear what she has been up to in the last year and an half.

BUT my mind loves to talk to me and so it did in the wee hours of the night before falling asleep. I really must say something about this idea that divorce damaging children. In my case, my children are fine. With some divorces I bet children do suffer and the children pay dearly (my parents divorce was not easy for me). In another article on another day I can share why I think this happens. But for now I want to address the women (and men- but especially women) who really want to leave an unhealthy marriage to honor themselves.

Loyalty and Honor: family loyalty is conflicting with the idea of self loyalty. When does the woman put herself first?

My situation: For years 5 and half years I struggled with the idea of divorcing my husband. I went to counseling; we went to counseling together; in and out of counseling. During the course of those years I had seen three personal counselors and we had seen three together (I had seen six. He had seen three). I put the kids first, because I had been told by nearly every one that a divorce “hurts” the children. Many times I reflected upon my parents divorce and decide “they must” be right. I even agreed at one point to stay married to him until the kids left home after high school. But I tried everything! I honestly worked at saving y marriage for 5 and a half years – getting more tired as time went on with little on no return! To be blatant, my X did not work at our marriage at all in the later years. It was easier for him to tell me how messed up I was. Every single counselor told me (and some told him too) that he had some deep issues to work through because these issues kept him trapped in a place of fear and pain. All three of my personal counselors had asked me, “Why are you I still married to this man”? I was stunned every time … LOYALTY was the first thought that popped into my head; Loyalty to him first, then loyalty to my children next. I just had to stay married to be loyal and true to my word despite how unhealthy our marriage had become and how miserable we both were not to mention that is was rubbing off onto our children in many ways!

Well, thank God, I was on a mission to be healthy; too look within myself and find answers. And most of all; be an honorable roll model for my children. To be honest that is when the idea of “loyalty” took a shift. “How can I teach my children to be healthy functioning adults if I a not willing to so that for myself first”? My boundaries became stronger, my path became clearer over time, and learning to honor myself became a new way of thinking. And guess what my children understood why Mommy and Daddy were getting a divorce. On the night I told my children, they both interrupted me and told me, “It is like you and Daddy are walking down separate paths” …

My children are fine! The three of us are much happier and I am much healthier emotionally and physically! I am much clearer on where my loyalty and honor stands.

Investment Club Meeting: February

Yep, that time again! Last night I went to my investment club meeting. Each month a member is assigned to be our education coordinator. She is in charge of organizing the education segment of our meetings. It was my turn last night and I invited a guest speaker to talk about empowerment. What an amazing hour of information and stories! I will be sharing some of what I learned in my upcoming monthly journal.

We did some journaling from the book The Energy of Money by Maria Nemeth, Ph.D. We worked on Life's Intentions which will eventually lead each of us to a list of goals. Personally, I set goals often and revisit them every few months. I even have some great tips and tools on how to set goals and achieve them. It is really nice to see a new way to develop goals; the way Maria Nemeth show us in her book. I would recommend to you to buy the book and start a group. It is a great way to be decifer what you might want in life and more fun do share the process within a group of supportive friends!

And the last item to mention is that many of us in the investment club will be reading The Great Depression Ahead by Harry S. Dent Jr. I have already started reading it. I am finding it easy to understand and most of all finding comfort in knowing that there are many directions to choose to prepare and ride out and even prosper during this upcoming downturn in our economy. Look for my book review in a few weeks!

"By Letting Go It All Gets Done"

I don't find myself really needing to talk much about my divorce and the process it takes to get through mine, but today I am feeling differently about that; mainly because I had an Oprah type aha moment but upgraded it to a holy shit is this for real? moment … and I am not the swearing type.

Here is a brief and hopefully objective history of the latest “stage” my x-husband and I are working through to get this divorce final.

This is about health insurance and an employer provided benefit package designed to set aside additional money to help cover our additional health care costs which are not covered by the insurance policy like co-pays and such. Several months ago (back in April) my x-husband verbally told me that he would keep me on the insurance as long as we are still legally married (which I am being told he has to do anyway) and that he would continue to set aside money for the kids, including my share, into this benefit plan.

At the beginning of January, I checked the account for funds because it was time to take my kids to their annual eye exam and my son was requesting to visit my acupuncturist. I found no money in the account … I call my X … couple days pass, I email him … He calls back and tells me, “Oh I guess I did not get that paperwork in on time”. The paperwork to participate in this benefit plan was due the end of November 2008! It was January when he tells – after I ask. So the dialog begins … Me: “Your word was to continue to provide” … X: “I think you should pay, I can’t afford it now”. … Me: “This money has always been coming out of your pay checks; of course you can afford it”. … X: “No, you pay the co-pays. You have a job now and then we will talk about it”. … Blah, blah, blah. Believe me, I came up with at least four ways to solve this and make it a win-win for both of us. Basically it appears he has changed is mind and doesn’t want to provide this benefit for anybody anymore – BUT he also thinks he can use money to control me (very long 20-year story). Short conversations went on for about two weeks with no resolution, not even one step, towards any progress.

I wanted to get mad. I felt the old patterns of control and manipulation surfacing. I was wondering what was going through is head, why was he being so difficult, he gave me his word … The basic mind chatter … The basic crazy making. I have spent the last three weeks (and with no word from him) really mulling over what I really want in terms of a marriage settlement.

So this morning I was thinking about it again. I felt my energy draining. “STOP”, I say, “My energy belongs to me and his energy belongs to him”. … “I need to react differently otherwise everything that went wrong in our relationship remains the same”. I felt a wave come over me -- I really think there is a deep underlining feeling that he needs to fill a gap, my gap, my need for extra financial support until I am able to completely provide for myself and my kids. But I do make enough money and I am making a little more each month. I have to let go of this idea that I need “rescue money” and trust myself to make all the money I am capable of making – which is endless. I’d rather use my energy in positive ways to build my business and investments rather than use my energy chasing my X to provide when he simply is not interested. … I let this feeling go and invited the trust-in-myself to come in its place.

I firmly decided that I will rewrite the current marriage settlement that I wrote back in October. I change my mind on asking for spousal support and the benefit plan for additional health care costs. He does pay child support and that will remain the same. I will ask that he give additionally what he can and to give from his heart otherwise I just do not want the money. I simply will not give the energy it may take to get the additional money on a regular basis – in the end it is not worth it.

So here comes the moment … He had the kids today after school for a few hours. He dropped them off as usual, we exchanged hellos, thanks yous and good byes and he left. I had couple of chores to wrap up before I settled in with my kids for the night. I went to the garage and I hear my X calling my name. I met him halfway up the driveway and he handed me $35 and said “I am sure that the tooth fairy will be visiting tonight” (and our daughter did indeed lose a tooth later; right before bedtime). Not to let my X see, but my mouth dropped open and my eyes widened --- wow! I told him Thank you! What he did and what I felt was exactly what I was talking to myself about earlier in the day. He really gave that money from his heart. I am 100% sure that I let go of a hindering thought today and by me letting go, it gave him the space to do what he did – give us $35 from his heart. AND I did not have to say a word out loud to anybody!

“By letting it go it all gets done.

The world is won by those who let it go.

But when you try and try.

The world is beyond the winning.”

~ Lao Tzu

Good night,

Jules

A Quote for Today: February

My friend Melina came over with her daughter this evening. It has been a few weeks since we have had time to catch up with each other and just visit. Mel brought me a gift -- a wall hanging -- perfect for my office! It reads:

"Success is not the key to happiness
Happiness is the key to success.
If you love what you are doing, you will be successful" --Buddha

A Quote for Today: November

A friend and co-worker sent me an email today - a slide show of a Chinese Proverb. I like what it said very much. Then at the end of this slide show one slide states that this Chinese Proverb originated in the Netherlands. I found that to be perplexing -- odd. Regardless of where if is really from I genuinely like what the message said. So I share it here:

"With money you can buy a house but not a home.
With money you can buy a clock but not time.
With money you can buy a bed but not sleep.
With money you can buy a book but not knowledge.
With money you can buy a doctor but not good health.
With money you can buy a position but not respect.
With money you can buy blood but not life.
With money you sex but not love."

Nature by the Drop Blending Lab

I scored on a mahogany table today off Craigslist! I needed a dining table because I hosted a Nature by the Drop blending lab tonight and did not have a dinning table.

Holly and I had two ladies come who knew a little about essential oils, but have not come to one of our labs yet. They each made a few items. My 7 year old daughter made herself a spritzer – she loves blending too!

I feel like I want to tell you more about these blending labs. We play an essential oil ice breaker to begin. Usually a new person has no idea what they want to make or what to expect from these labs. There are so many oils to choose from that it can be over whelming. So we purchased a deck of informative cards; each card features an essential oil and describes all the qualities of that particular oil. We each randomly choose a card and share what it says and then smell that oil. It is fun to see everyone light up when they discover they can really use the oil they chose for a particular purpose they happen to be working on lately.

A Quote for Today: July

This is written in the Hebrew Talmud...

"Be very careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. The woman came out of a man's rib. Not from his feet to be walked on. Not from his head to be superior, but from the side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected, and next to the heart to be loved."

Nature by the Drop

Holly and I held another essential oil blending today! These labs really are a lot of fun! Today's lab was small with four women sitting around the table blending to their hearts content.

In case you have not read other blog entries titled Nature by the Drop, my friend Holly and I have a little business venture brewing. Holly is teaching me all about essential oils. We have teamed up together and we host blending labs each month in my home. People come over for a few hours to learn about essential oils. Then they make personal products with the oils and other natural organic ingredients.

Another Successful Yard Sale

I am so happy to be getting rid of so much. I am the type the does not like to accumulate items and I do go through closets on a regular basis, but when moving it really forces me to let stuff go -- I love. I had another yard sale today. This will be the last one because I need to move by the end of the month! Made another $300.00 today, I'd say that was a success! Yahoo!
And I have to add that a very cool thunder storm came through today -- made for a nice way to end the yard sale!

Nature by the Drop Event

Last night Holly and I had another essential oil blending lab. One of Holly’s dear friends, Mindy, hosted it in her home in the Carmel Valley. We had eight ladies show up to make wonderful blends of their own. I find it rather special to see a group of woman come together to be creative and socialize. So the evening was rewarding on many levels. I am happy to be working on this business venture with Holly and sharing the knowledge about the healing properties of essential oils.