Book Review: A Girl Needs Cash

Of course I loved this book! Joan Perry writes about how we women should take charge of our financial lives – with a “girl power” attitude. Joan sings the same song I do! Nobody is going to come along and take care of our financial life; banish that “White Knight Myth”. We are completely capable of knowing what we want, setting our priorities financially and taking action. We do this in our family lives, in our social lives, career lives, and I certainly hope our sexual lives! Joan points out that women are in a financial revolution and I sense that she is right -- I love that! Joan breaks through some of the misconceptions that maybe the culprit which keeps many women financially captive. Joan explains how to review spending habits and develop new sources of income to create the kind of life you want to live. Singing the same one again -- That is what I do in my class Personal Finance from the Inside Out (but I take a different approach). Ladies, no matter how old you are or where you are at in your life, it is time to take charge of your financial life. Learn some new attitudes and thoughts around money. A Girl Needs Cash is an important book to read and I think it should be in every woman’s library.

Enjoy,

Jules

Back to School: Personal Finance From the Inside Out

Do you realize that more than 85% of the households in this country are run by women? Yet where did we learn to do this? Slowly over the last 40 years, men have turned this job over to the women!

This class is a lot of fun ... we take a closer look at the household income and expenses; Like my friend Ahnalisa says, "Cash in and cash out, it is like the breathe of the household".

CLASS BEGINS: Thursday, August 27, 2009 6:30pm to 8:30pm

• In this class, we take a look at our attitudes around money and ask our selves what financial freedom means to us.
  
• We take a look at how simple, or not as difficult as it may seem, to achieve financial freedom.
  
• We learn some simple guidelines for how to set up a budget and follow the budget.
  
• We learn some goal setting and list what needs to happen to obtain those goals.
  
• Journaling happens!
• We take a Money Personality Test; get to know your personality around money.
  
• Learn to start thinking about how you can invest and empower yourself around money! ... and more!
  

If you live local in the Monterey Bay area and want to sign up, please email me directly at: jewleyd@comcast.net I will eventually teach this course over the internet, so keep in touch if you are interested!

Cheers,
Julie

New Habits Create a Plan for Finacial Well-Being

I just finished another group, teaching my class about personal finance from the inside out. I would like to share a success with you. Yes, it really does feel great to take charge of your money and strengthen your relationship with money.

So many of us don’t want to look at our spending habits but when you make that decision and you do it with a little guidance; taking a closer look can reveal so much! With solid tools, your life begins to take shape in a direction that your want it to go and you begin to feel empowered.

I am so proud of Wendy (I am proud of all the women who have gone though my class for unique reasons for each of them), but Wendy stands out only because she came to realize that she has been standing in her own way. She was the sole reason why she was not getting ahead financially and feeling behind every month. All it took was for her to take a closer look at her spending habits, create budget (I like to call it a financial plan), dream a little, shift some of her thoughts to thinking differently, and make a plan with tangible goals and viola Wendy is starting a business doing what she loves to do – she is like a race horse that just left the gate! GO Wendy!

Become the CEO of your own destiny!
Enjoy the day!
Jules

If you want more information about my class: Personal Finance From the Inside Out, please email me directly, Twitter me or find me on Facebook. You will find my email on my biography page

Investment Club Meeting: June

I always look forward to the second Wednesday of each month not only to I get to spend three hours socializing with some really dynamic women, but to spend the time learning all we can about the big huge world of investing and to share what we have learned on our own during the last month in between meetings. I really do enjoy the world of investing! I have always had a deep interest in all the people who can take an idea and make it work or, take some cash and turn it into a portfolio worth more. And guess what? This really is not rocket science. It just takes an interest and education; in my case self-education! I choose to learn in a group alongside other like-minded women by starting this investment club nearly 5 years ago.

It was Christy’s turn at education coordinator . So tonight our guest speaker, Buck, a consultant for the very young company Monavie (a wellness drink) spoke about the concepts of network marketing. Basically there are many advantages to be an independent consultant or a company that chooses the network marketing route and if it fits with your personality, find one that has a product you believe in and go for it! I’ll write an article specifically on network marketing for you and explain the concept in greater details. So look for that in the weeks to come.

After our guest speaker left, the gals in the club, gathered around laptops after desert to do some stock research and found two companies that we are very excited about and will be doing further research during the next few days. We will have to call a meeting in the middle of the month – these companies look that good to us!

I’ll keep you posted!

Good night

Jules

Investment Club Meeting: May

Laptops hummin', worksheets in hand, calculators ready; first stop Yahoo Finance!

Last night my women's investment club met for our monthly meeting and it was a working meeting. After diner and our regular meeting, one of our founding members lead an introduction workshop on stock research and study for our newest members. Our club has come up with our own set of criteria for choosing a stock. Our club is registered with the National Association of Investment Clubs (NAIC) and we do following Better Investing's stock study model for the most part. Over the years our club ha been visited by several guest speakers on the subject of stock study and our club has our own personality around stock research. Last night we focused on researching stocks that pay dividends.

We discussed our last reading assignment: Suze Orman's 2009 Action Plan. I wrote a book review and you can read it here on my blog, if you are interested. We chose another book to read. It is called The Whole Kitt and Caboodle: A Painless Journey to Investment Enlightenment, by Susan Laubach.

I took on the role of retreat coordinator and I will be planning our next investment retreat. Also our newest member ha taken on the role of Community Outreach Coordinator - she is going to find an avenue for us to volunteer a day to help women and or children is some capacity before the year-end.

It was a very productive meeting! There is much to do over the several weeks and I am feeling very enthusiastic about all of it! ... what a nice way to feel when it comes to money and investing -- I love it!

Make it a great day!
Jules

Personal Finance From the Inside Out

Do you realize that more than 85% of the households in this country are run by women? Yet where did we learn to do this? Slowly over the last 40 years, men have turned this job over to the women!

This class is a lot of fun ... we take a closer look at the household income and expenses; Like my friend Ahnalisa says, "Cash in and cash out, it is like the breathe of the household".

CLASS BEGINS: Thurday, May 21, 2009 6:30pm to 8:30pm

• In this class, we take a look at our attitudes around money and ask our selves what financial freedom means to us.
  
• We take a look at how simple, or not as difficult as it may seem, to achieve financial freedom.
  
• We learn some simple guidelines for how to set up a budget and follow the budget.
  
• We learn some goal setting and list what needs to happen to obtain those goals.
  
• Journaling happens!
• W e take a Money Personality Test; get to know your personality around money.
  
• Learn to start thinking about how you can invest and empower yourself around money! ... and more!
  

If you live local in the Monterey Bay area and want to sign up, please email me directly at: jewleyd@comcast.net I will eventually teach this course over the internet, so keep in touch if you are interested!

Cheers,
Julie

Let's Read: A Girl Needs Cash

This is the current financial book I am reading. Check out a copy at your local library or buy one and read along with me ... or check back in a couple of weeks for my review.
Cheers,
Jules

Nature by the Drop Blending Lab

On Saturday, after my son's baseball game (his team won by the way -- tied all the way to the end. Final score was 6 to 5), I met my friend Holly over at our mutual friend's Veterinary Clininc to host this month's essential oil blending lab. We had invited all of our friend's clients with the intention to focus on the health and well-being of their pets and using essential oils to help with that. Well today only one person came to our blending lab. But it turned out so lovely; it became a one-on-one, three hour consultation for Deb (which gives me lots of new expanding ideas). This "private session" gave us the opportunity to get a bit more personal. We helped Deb create special healing blends for each person in her family (we ran out of time and did not get to make one for her dog, but she did get something pre-blended for her). ... A very nice afternoon! ... Then off I wen to the beach to pick my son up from a birthday party. My daughter spent the day with Grandma.

Cheers,
Julie

Book Review: Suze Orman's 2009 Action Plan

Last month the ladies of the investment club that I belong to chose to read Suze Orman's new book. I also suggested that the readers of my monthly journal (free newsletter) read it along with us. Well, I did indeed read it and here is what I think about out it.

Her usual message comes through loud and clear, "you must commit to taking action". There is just no room for taking the back seat when it comes to understanding your financial situation and knowing what you need to do with your money.

Suze first spells out very briefly the current global credit crisis. I love her parable, "Our economy is like a patient who was rushed to the hospital in critical condition. After months of aggressive intervention ... the patient is still in the Intensive Care Unit, but the prognosis is that eventually there will be a full recovery. In the meantime, the patient will move into a rehabilitation facility and start to get back on his or her feet. Before too long, the patient will be stable enough to go home, though it might be years before he of she is back to full health".

So what do you do with your money while you ride this "rehabilitation" time out?

The chapters in Suze's book are organized in nine (9) areas of money: Credit, Retirement, Savings, Spending, Real Estate, Paying for College and Family which includes insurance and job loss. Suze lists multiple scenarios for each of these area. So you must read through (a very easy read) to see which scenario might best fit your situation. Then she tells you what to do with an "action plan" for each scenario.

Please be diligent and research any advice no matter how "expert" someone maybe. For example, if you do not understand or know what a treasury money market fund is or an EFT is, then educate yourself and learn. It is important to understand why her action plans are good at this time during a general economic downturn. The economy changes and goes through its cycles; money grows well in one investment during a down turn but then may performs poorly when the economy is booming. Thus, through learning you will also see that money can grow through investments no matter how the economy is doing. I always say, "create your own economy"!

So Suze's book is a great place to start, but there is more work to be done. So get your 2009 action plan started if you have not done so already already.

When fear and doubt are in control you may make decisions that feel "right", but the biggest risk is giving in to your emotions. Do nothing rash". ~Suze Orman
Suze's Ormans 2009 Action Plan

Message from Ladybug Totem

Several months ago I was prepping windows in my living room for a fresh coat of paint. I saw something red, black and rather strange in the top corner. It was something like a wasps nest at first glance but it was red and black ... as I came closer the image that my eyes were having a difficult time identifying came clear once I realize the the black spots were not holes but dots on the backs of about 8 lady bugs clumped together. I was amazed to say the least; what a pleasant finding! But I had moved into the house in August and this was a day in December ... pondering ... what were they eating in order to live in my house? I have no plants in the house and certainly no aphids for them to eat. So I moved them ... and painted my windowsills.

Well, several weeks later I found that the lady bugs moved back -- they are back on the window again. And guess what? This corner of my house, in Feng Shui, is the wealth and luxury corner. Cool place for ladybugs to be hanging out for no apparent reason. My kids and I use the area of the house for curling up with a good book and reading and we now call it ladybug corner.

Well, today April 6, I took the kids out for something fun, first I thought we'd take a hike and have a picnic, they wanted to to go to the Monterey Bay Aquarium, but I really wanted to enjoy the outdoors. It was a warm day today and rain is due for the rest of the week. Then I remembered a beach that I had never been to an was told by a friend that there is tons of sea glass at this beach. That sounded perfect and that was were I took the kids.

Now guess what? Yes, we found tons of sea glass BUT we found two ladybugs on the sand! Again what a pleasant surprise and what an unusual place to find not one but two ladybugs!

Later in the day I took the kids over to the Farmer's Market in Pacific Grove. This market began last summer and today was our first time to this market. Shortly after our arrived this very cute little terrier came up to say hello. The owner was right behind her. After we oohed and awed over this sweet dog, her owner tells us her name is Ladybug. "Okay", my mind tells me, "look up ladybugs. There is a message here for us".

Over the years I have learned that when I hear or see things repeat, a form of my intuition is communicating to me. The following is what I learned about ladybugs today. It all feels true for me and my family (the three of us). And I think it is so darn cool how things work around here -- there are messages for us everywhere! Life is good, really really good and it is meant to be this good.

Sources: www.sayahda.com, www..starstuffs.com, www.linsdomain.com

Ladybugs are about metamorphosis, growth and manifestation of thoughts and ideas. Our wishes begin to be fulfilled. Higher goals and new successes are possible. Worries begin to dissipate. New happiness comes about. Fall and Spring are the most abundance times for a person with a Ladybug totem. Ladybug also cautions not to try to hard or go to fast to fulfill dreams. Let things flow at their natural pace. In the due course of time, wishes and desires will all come true. Ladybug's life spans are about four weeks. Several generations are produced each summer. This links the energy of the ladybug to renewal and regeneration. Those with this totem are usually family oriented with strong morals and social values. Because the life cycle of an adult ladybug is short, it teaches us to release worry and to live life to the fullest. When it appears in our life it is telling us to let go. Ladybug teaches us to restore our faith and trust in the greater spirit - God. It initiates change where it is needed most. When Ladybug appears it is asking us to get out of our own way and allow the greater spirit to enter. An adult ladybug can consume several thousands of aphids and other scale insects within a few months. Because of its diet the ladybug often has parasites and those with this medicine often need to take care of their digestive system. Now is the time to examine eating habits. Ladybug has a protective quality, keen instincts and in spite of its size it appears to be fearless. The ladybug reconnects us with the joy of living, teaching us to transform and release our fears and return to love. "ahhh", Julie

My Intentions for A Newer Car

My 14 year old car tried to act like it was going to breakdown on me while driving to the cabin in the Sierra last weekend. My thermostat appears to be going out and says the car is overheating when it actually it the car is NOT overheating -- talk about stressing out just a little.

My kids and I travel a lot by car and I have put over 100,000 miles on my Ford Taurus -- this car has served us well. But it is time, I would like a newer car now.

... So here, I share with you my intentions for a newer car. I wrote down exactly what I desire in a new car and ... I'll keep you posted when this becomes a manifestation! I did this for the house I am currently living in. You can read my article titled ... (I have to find it) ...

My Intention for a Newer Car:

"I create the perfect car within 6 months from today or sooner; with the perfect terms and features that meet all my desires and more"!

• 2004 or Younger
• Power Windows
• Power Seats
• AC
• CD Player/Radio/Stereo Speakers
• GPS
• Low Millage
• Mechanically Clean/very good condition or better
• Clean Body/very good condition or better
• Body Paint -- Colors like: blues, greens, reds, opal white, burnt orange or prettier
  
• Under Market or Blue book Value
• Tire in good condition or better
• 4 Wheel Drive
• Seats at least 5 people with cargo space interchangeable with additional passenger seating
• Terms: "Gentleman's Handshake" and $250.00 an month or less.
• One of these Makers:
• BMW, Audie, Mercedes, Chrysler, Lincoln, Lexus, Land Rover, Porsche, Dodge
  

Retreat in the Sierras with Women From My Investment Club

A retreatful weekend; I spent two days in a cabin in the California Sierras (in a small town called Pine Crest) with nine uniquely wonderful women! It was truly relaxing and rejuvenating; a memorable weekend to say the least.

This is the clubs second annual retreat. Each participating member is in charge of a project for an hour to two hours in length. The project can be about anything as long as it has something to do with money or empowerment. Our weekend began with a walk out to large rocks sitting above water level in Pine Lake for morning meditation. Upon returning to the cabin, Mel lead us in a journaling session, then Lisa showed us her system for goal setting, Jill brought wool yarns and we each made short scarves using a uncommon technique of crafting them, we grazed through magazines and each created a collage -- some people called theirs vision boards. We ended the first day with a movie that Elizabeth brought, "Splendor in the Grass" a classic staring Natalie Wood and Warren Beaty. Sunday morning, Christy had us on a scavenger hunt through the Wall Street Journal and Kimberle shared about some recycling tips showed us how to make a simple and safe cleaning product for our home. I must add that we ran out of time and I did not get to share my project which was to play a very fun game that Robert Kiyosaki came up with called Cash Flow 101. And we unknowingly ate all the eggs, so Nicole did not get to show us how to make face masks. The next time we go on retreat, we will have to add another half day.

As I share and write this recap of our weekend, it sounds so simple -- it was -- but I got so much out of being with people who are like-minded. I was inspired by hearing the more personal details of my friend's lives and listening to how they have overcome the roadblocks and how the are setting goals for the next adventures in their lives. I loved hearing my friends share their ideas and dreams. I like to see how different we all are yet see how we are also so similar as humans, as women and some of us as mothers. I appreciate so much how we each give in our individual ways. The real beauty of it is when we are being authentic we give and enrich others without even realizing the impact we make!











Blessings, Jules

My Kids School Hosted very Successful Plant-A-Thon

"We don't sell any cookies or candy," said Erin Sullivan, a parent and organizer of the day's event. "We wanted something more in line with the principles of our school."

My kids got to Monterey Bay Charter School -- a Waldorf inspired public charter school ... and today members of our school planted native plants to help restore a local lagoon back to its natural habitat. At the same time this event is raising money for our school.

The 75 acre lot of land used to be farm land and the State of California purchased it from the owners, I think, two years ago. And now an organization called Return of the Natives (RON) is helping to restore this land.

I am very exited, our school had over 250 volunteers show up. We were originally expected to plant 800 native plants like mugwort, lupine, California sagebush and more ... But RON brought 1,901 plants and we planted every single one of them!

If you wan to read the article that our local newspaper wrote about us, here is the link:
http://www.montereyherald.com/local/ci_11971312?source=email (or copy and paste)

If you would like to make a donation, big or small to help my kids' school, here is a link: http://www.mbcharterschool.org/plant-a-thon.asp (or copy and paste)

Donations are accepted through Wednesday, April 22, Earth Day.

Thanks for your support!

Blessings,
Julie

Writing the First Issue of my FREE Monthly Journal

Well, I do feel I have another rewarding accomplishment completed, yet just beginning ... "Phew" and "Wow" at the same time. I had a lot of fun creating this first issue of my journal (newsletter)!

Right now the only way you can get it is to subscribe to it. You can sign-up here on this blog. Just go to the top right of the page and you will see the sign-up box.

I decided to name this newsletter: "From the Pages of Copia's Journal". I write about all areas of a woman's life; her family life, social life, lots about her financial life, her health, her spiritual life (not religion) and the life styles we choose, which is a culmination of all of the above. ... just thought about her sex life ... hmm will have to add this one later ...

I really feel like I have found my life's purpose and have begun a journey to great and wonderful accomplishments! I invite you to join me, follow me and subscribe!

Enjoy,
Jules

A Maya Angleou Poem from Ms. Mia

Today when I went to work in the office at my kids' school, I found a poem written by Maya Angelou on my desk. It was given to me from one of our dear and wise kindergarten teachers, Ms. Mia. Thank you Mia for this gift!

Maya Angelou's "What Every Woman Should Have"

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
Enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own,
even if she never wants to or needs to ...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
Something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour ...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
A youth she's content to leave behind ...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
A past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age ...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra ...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
One friend who always makes her
laugh ... and one who lets her cry ...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
A good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her
family ...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
Eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored ...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
A feeling of control over her destiny ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW ...
How to fall in love without losing herself ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to quit a job, break up with a lover,
and confront a friend without ruining the friendship ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
When to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW ...
That she can't change the length of her calves,the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW ...
that her childhood may not have been perfect..but it's over ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW ...
What she would and wouldn't do for love or more ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW ...
How to live alone... even if she doesn't like it ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW ...
whom she can trust, whom she can't,
and why she shouldn't take it personally ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW ...
Where to go...be it to her best friend's kitchen table...or a charming inn in the woods ... when her soul needs soothing ...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW ...
What she can and can't accomplish in a day ... a month ... and a year ...

Nature by the Drop Blending Lab

Today Holly and I featured the essential oil of Lemon at our monthly blending lab. This is one of my favorite oils! I clean house with it. Just the other day I was removing the tape off window where I had painted the trim and the heat of the sunshine seemed to have "melted" the tape to the window in some areas. So I use two drops of oil on my hand and rubbed the area of he window where needed an d the razor I was using took right off! Yay! I also like to add a drop od essential oil of lemon to my water or tea (I only trust and ingest Young Living's essential oil of Lemon). There are many other uses for this oil. But this is what I do with it and love it! -- Blessing, Jules

Investment Club Meeting: March

Another successful investment club meeting tonight! I really love when the members of this club gather once a month. I am always so jazzed to hear how everyone is doing and what they have accomplished towards their financial goals since we've last met. There is something very inspiring when we, as women, repeatedly succeed in the financial and business realm which has been typically a male dominated arena ever since there were goods to trade. So I love what this club is all about.

... And it appears we are going to have to create a waiting list of women who wish to join us! I am both excited and bummed at the same time. Excited that more women want to take part in what we are doing as a club and want to take charge of their own financial well-being. And bummed that our club is designed to only have so many members. So that is one of the reason why I have started a FREE monthly journal; to share some of what we are doing in this women's investment club (There is a sign-up box at the top, right side of this blog).

Members take turns each month to coordinate a guest speaker or presentation. Well, tonight we had a quest speaker. She is a sea captain, chef, artist, widow, cancer survior, drowning survivor and simply, positively inspiring! Since I did not ask her for permission to tell her story, I won't. Essentially, her message was to find your heart's desires then find and do what it takes to live your heart' desires.

Another message that I took away from our meeting and feel is important share is that we women are resiliant, adaptable, determined and even warriors. And when we can come together in groups like this one and see how on some level we are the same and yet still very different, we leave knowing what we each have inside ourselves. We do have what it takes ... what it takes to do what ever your heart desires!

Cheers,
Jules

Personal Finance From the Inside Out

I finished teaching my beta three-week course today! I'll be asking my students if they are willing to write a review and then share what they said with you.

I am going to make a few changes and improvements based on the feedback from those ladies who took this first class from me. Thanks ladies for all of your constructive feedback and support!

I am offering two more (but for four-weeks this time) Personal Finance From the Inside Out courses on Thursday, March 19, 2009 at two different times.

Do you realize that more than 85% of the households in this country are run by women? Yet where did we learn to do this? Slowly over the last 40 years, men have turned this job over to the women!

This class is a lot of fun ... we take a closer look at the household income and expenses; Like my friend Ahnalisa says, "Cash in and cash out, it is like the breathe of the household". In this class, we take a look at our attitudes around money, ask our selves what financial freedom means to us. We take a look at how simple or not as difficult as it may seem to achieve financial freedom. We learn some simple guidelines for how to set up a budget and follow the budget. We learn some goal setting and list what needs to happen to obtain those goals. Journaling happens! W e take a Money Personality Test; get to know your personality around money. Learn to start thinking about how you can invest and empower yourself around money! ... and more!

If you live local in the Monterey Bay area and want to sign up, please email me directly at: jewleyd@comcast.net I will eventually teach this course over the internet, so keep in touch if you are interested!

Cheers,
Jules

March: Spiritual Book Club

I don’t’ think I have told you yet. Once a month I join four other lovely friends for a spiritual book club. We are on our third book now. We came together nearly a year ago and started with Eckhart Tolle’s book, A New Earth, Awaken to Your Life’s Purpose. I couldn’t put the book down and reread it three times! I even have the book on CD and would listen to certain chapters over and over again like a reference book. You know what? I’ll write book review on a later day, so be in touch.

The second book we read I did not like very much. I was the only one out of the five of us they felt this way, I think..

Now we are reading The Anatomy of the Spirit, The Seven Stages of Power and Healing by Caroline Myss, PH.D. I love this one too! It is all about taking full responsibility for our health, emotional and physical. She teaches how to manage our energy. When I am done with this book, I’ll write a book review on this one too! Keep you posted!

Blessings,

Jules

"A Healthy Divorce is Better Than an Unhealthy Marriage"

I had the opportunity to see and visit a girl friend I had not spent any time with in the last year and a half or so due to our busy lives. My friend Cindy was invited to come to the auction dinner that my kids’ school hosted by a mutual friend. Cindy, dear Cindy – love her! She works with my x-husband at the hospital and so it was through him that we have become friends over the years. She was disappointed to hear that I am divorcing. My friend Cindy was just so stuck on the idea that divorce negatively effects the children; I don’t remember the exact word she used – but says that no matter what, divorce damages children. Then went on to say that unless a relationship is abusive people should stay married (if there are children) … and she commented that she thinks too much like Laura Schlessinger.

Well, I just listened to her. Of course she would not hear me when I said my relationship was abusive – emotionally it was abusive (on another day I will recommend some books to read if you think you are in an emotional abusive relationship). But if you know my X and me, you too would be in disbelief to hear this and brush it off with a “Ya right” under your breath. It was not my goal in that moment or anytime for that matter to convince my friend of anything. I was just happy to see her and hear what she has been up to in the last year and an half.

BUT my mind loves to talk to me and so it did in the wee hours of the night before falling asleep. I really must say something about this idea that divorce damaging children. In my case, my children are fine. With some divorces I bet children do suffer and the children pay dearly (my parents divorce was not easy for me). In another article on another day I can share why I think this happens. But for now I want to address the women (and men- but especially women) who really want to leave an unhealthy marriage to honor themselves.

Loyalty and Honor: family loyalty is conflicting with the idea of self loyalty. When does the woman put herself first?

My situation: For years 5 and half years I struggled with the idea of divorcing my husband. I went to counseling; we went to counseling together; in and out of counseling. During the course of those years I had seen three personal counselors and we had seen three together (I had seen six. He had seen three). I put the kids first, because I had been told by nearly every one that a divorce “hurts” the children. Many times I reflected upon my parents divorce and decide “they must” be right. I even agreed at one point to stay married to him until the kids left home after high school. But I tried everything! I honestly worked at saving y marriage for 5 and a half years – getting more tired as time went on with little on no return! To be blatant, my X did not work at our marriage at all in the later years. It was easier for him to tell me how messed up I was. Every single counselor told me (and some told him too) that he had some deep issues to work through because these issues kept him trapped in a place of fear and pain. All three of my personal counselors had asked me, “Why are you I still married to this man”? I was stunned every time … LOYALTY was the first thought that popped into my head; Loyalty to him first, then loyalty to my children next. I just had to stay married to be loyal and true to my word despite how unhealthy our marriage had become and how miserable we both were not to mention that is was rubbing off onto our children in many ways!

Well, thank God, I was on a mission to be healthy; too look within myself and find answers. And most of all; be an honorable roll model for my children. To be honest that is when the idea of “loyalty” took a shift. “How can I teach my children to be healthy functioning adults if I a not willing to so that for myself first”? My boundaries became stronger, my path became clearer over time, and learning to honor myself became a new way of thinking. And guess what my children understood why Mommy and Daddy were getting a divorce. On the night I told my children, they both interrupted me and told me, “It is like you and Daddy are walking down separate paths” …

My children are fine! The three of us are much happier and I am much healthier emotionally and physically! I am much clearer on where my loyalty and honor stands.

Investment Club Meeting: February

Yep, that time again! Last night I went to my investment club meeting. Each month a member is assigned to be our education coordinator. She is in charge of organizing the education segment of our meetings. It was my turn last night and I invited a guest speaker to talk about empowerment. What an amazing hour of information and stories! I will be sharing some of what I learned in my upcoming monthly journal.

We did some journaling from the book The Energy of Money by Maria Nemeth, Ph.D. We worked on Life's Intentions which will eventually lead each of us to a list of goals. Personally, I set goals often and revisit them every few months. I even have some great tips and tools on how to set goals and achieve them. It is really nice to see a new way to develop goals; the way Maria Nemeth show us in her book. I would recommend to you to buy the book and start a group. It is a great way to be decifer what you might want in life and more fun do share the process within a group of supportive friends!

And the last item to mention is that many of us in the investment club will be reading The Great Depression Ahead by Harry S. Dent Jr. I have already started reading it. I am finding it easy to understand and most of all finding comfort in knowing that there are many directions to choose to prepare and ride out and even prosper during this upcoming downturn in our economy. Look for my book review in a few weeks!

"By Letting Go It All Gets Done"

I don't find myself really needing to talk much about my divorce and the process it takes to get through mine, but today I am feeling differently about that; mainly because I had an Oprah type aha moment but upgraded it to a holy shit is this for real? moment … and I am not the swearing type.

Here is a brief and hopefully objective history of the latest “stage” my x-husband and I are working through to get this divorce final.

This is about health insurance and an employer provided benefit package designed to set aside additional money to help cover our additional health care costs which are not covered by the insurance policy like co-pays and such. Several months ago (back in April) my x-husband verbally told me that he would keep me on the insurance as long as we are still legally married (which I am being told he has to do anyway) and that he would continue to set aside money for the kids, including my share, into this benefit plan.

At the beginning of January, I checked the account for funds because it was time to take my kids to their annual eye exam and my son was requesting to visit my acupuncturist. I found no money in the account … I call my X … couple days pass, I email him … He calls back and tells me, “Oh I guess I did not get that paperwork in on time”. The paperwork to participate in this benefit plan was due the end of November 2008! It was January when he tells – after I ask. So the dialog begins … Me: “Your word was to continue to provide” … X: “I think you should pay, I can’t afford it now”. … Me: “This money has always been coming out of your pay checks; of course you can afford it”. … X: “No, you pay the co-pays. You have a job now and then we will talk about it”. … Blah, blah, blah. Believe me, I came up with at least four ways to solve this and make it a win-win for both of us. Basically it appears he has changed is mind and doesn’t want to provide this benefit for anybody anymore – BUT he also thinks he can use money to control me (very long 20-year story). Short conversations went on for about two weeks with no resolution, not even one step, towards any progress.

I wanted to get mad. I felt the old patterns of control and manipulation surfacing. I was wondering what was going through is head, why was he being so difficult, he gave me his word … The basic mind chatter … The basic crazy making. I have spent the last three weeks (and with no word from him) really mulling over what I really want in terms of a marriage settlement.

So this morning I was thinking about it again. I felt my energy draining. “STOP”, I say, “My energy belongs to me and his energy belongs to him”. … “I need to react differently otherwise everything that went wrong in our relationship remains the same”. I felt a wave come over me -- I really think there is a deep underlining feeling that he needs to fill a gap, my gap, my need for extra financial support until I am able to completely provide for myself and my kids. But I do make enough money and I am making a little more each month. I have to let go of this idea that I need “rescue money” and trust myself to make all the money I am capable of making – which is endless. I’d rather use my energy in positive ways to build my business and investments rather than use my energy chasing my X to provide when he simply is not interested. … I let this feeling go and invited the trust-in-myself to come in its place.

I firmly decided that I will rewrite the current marriage settlement that I wrote back in October. I change my mind on asking for spousal support and the benefit plan for additional health care costs. He does pay child support and that will remain the same. I will ask that he give additionally what he can and to give from his heart otherwise I just do not want the money. I simply will not give the energy it may take to get the additional money on a regular basis – in the end it is not worth it.

So here comes the moment … He had the kids today after school for a few hours. He dropped them off as usual, we exchanged hellos, thanks yous and good byes and he left. I had couple of chores to wrap up before I settled in with my kids for the night. I went to the garage and I hear my X calling my name. I met him halfway up the driveway and he handed me $35 and said “I am sure that the tooth fairy will be visiting tonight” (and our daughter did indeed lose a tooth later; right before bedtime). Not to let my X see, but my mouth dropped open and my eyes widened --- wow! I told him Thank you! What he did and what I felt was exactly what I was talking to myself about earlier in the day. He really gave that money from his heart. I am 100% sure that I let go of a hindering thought today and by me letting go, it gave him the space to do what he did – give us $35 from his heart. AND I did not have to say a word out loud to anybody!

“By letting it go it all gets done.

The world is won by those who let it go.

But when you try and try.

The world is beyond the winning.”

~ Lao Tzu

Good night,

Jules

Nature by the Drop Blending Lab

"Make something sensual for your special Valentine"!

I hosted a blend lab last night. For those of you who have not read about this yet, a dear friend, Holly and I came together over a year ago and began hosting what we call blending labs in my home. We invite everybody we know to come (and to bring friends) and learn to blend personal products with 100% organic chemical free bases and Young Living's essential oils.

Last night we featured the essential oil Jasmine: "Queen of the Night". Did you know that for centuries women have treasured Jasmine for its beautiful, seductive fragrance? Jasmine has been studied by university researchers for its uses to dramatically improve mental accuracy and concentration. The ladies who used Jasmine in their personal blends last night will be sure that their man will be paying attention!

Until next blending lab!
Jules

A Quote for Today: February

My friend Melina came over with her daughter this evening. It has been a few weeks since we have had time to catch up with each other and just visit. Mel brought me a gift -- a wall hanging -- perfect for my office! It reads:

"Success is not the key to happiness
Happiness is the key to success.
If you love what you are doing, you will be successful" --Buddha

Book Review: "This is easy to read, simple to understand and a good place to start"!

I highly recommend this book for one very simple reason. It sheds light on a large portion of the driving force of our economy -- something we cannot change; Family Spending Cycles. There are so many factors in calculating why the economy is doing what it is at any given time. Many more factors to consider in order to predict an economy. But to understand a major driving force of our economy here in the United States gives insight and some comfort in knowing that it is just a cycle like anything else and in time will cycle back.

Harry S. Dent Jr. says, “An old economy must die for a new one to emerge”.

The book I recommend is called Roaring 2000’s, by Harry S. Dent Jr. Then read his latest book, The Great Depression Ahead. But don't let that title scare you. Be informed, be empowered, be in position to ride this economy out!

Our economy is driven by Family Spending Cycles. And you don't have to be an economist to understand this!

Consumption: How the average family spends money shows in predictable patterns over time. Harry S. Dent Jr. calls this pattern the “S” Curve.

People hit the work force @ average age 19
People get married @ average age 25.5 (men @ 27, women @ 24)
First child @ average age of 27.5
Starter home is purchased @ average of 33 –34
By the average age of 43 the largest home is purchased
Family Spending Cycles peaks @ average age of 46.5 – years 2008-2009
After 46 spending becomes discretionary (move into travel and leisure spending) *but end of Family Spending!

So basically pay attention to the largest populations of people moving through life now; here in the United States and in other Countries. Harry S. Dent Jr. explains this and so much more. I must say though, in some countries the generation cycles are not key to growth simply due to standard of living – people are poor (health care is poor) and don’t live long enough.

One more thing I'd like to highlight that Harry S. Dent Jr. talks about; the internet. The Internet is the key to the next information revolution - a 500 year cycle. The last information revolution began in 1440 with the printing press. 500 years later, in 1947, we have the transistor, which is the basis for today’s computer and communications technology. We are only 62 years in to the next revolution ... just imagine what is still to come!

Enjoy,
Jules

If you want to buy either Roaring 2000's or The Great Depression Ahead by Harry S. Dent Jr., visit Copia's Bookshelf in the column to the right. Just scroll down the page and you will see it. Also, sign-up for my FREE monthly Journal and be a part of a growing community of women moving in new directions!

Women Want o Talk About Money!

It is really wonderful to see the woman I have come into contact with get so excited about the topic of money! If this is the first article you have read on my blog, then let me share this with you first before I continue.

I started a women's investment club in November 2004. The group has changed the lives of all its members in more ways than just learning how to invest, actually investing and even earning more money. Somehow the path that the club has taken us has enriched all areas of each of our lives.

The investment club just added five new members in January and we are now at capacity according to the club's bylaws. BUT word is getting out and more women are very interested in what we are doing. And I would love nothing more than to somehow reach these women who are interested. This is so exciting to me! When I first started the club, I asked all my friends if they would be interested in such a club and guess what? I was amazed at how many of my girls friends told me "No thank you, my husband takes care of our investments". Well, I was married then (Still am but am now going through a divorce now)and my husband was not interested in investments. I had always been interested, but nobody taught me, not high school, not my parents, not even college. Anyway, I had decided it was time to learn on my own and I wanted a comfortable environment to learn in so I created a women's investment club.

So now what I am doing is starting a FREE monthly journal that you can get through email. This journal will share all that I am learning and all that the investment club does. I am in the process of building a website that will offer so much more than the monthly journal. This is is how I will reach all of you who are interested in what I am doing and what my investment club is doing and MORE!

And stay in touch with me because I have more plans evolving that will knock your socks off. I can not sit still just thinking about them and the possibilities!

Enjoy the day!
Jules

Oh and to sign-up for the FREE monthly Journal, just look in the column on the right near the top!

Investment Club Meeting: January

Last night was my women's investment club meeting. Our new president did a fabulous job of running her first meeting. We had five new members join last night! That is very exciting! Everyone is so happy about that! We are beginning to plan our annual retreat which is planned for three days in March. We set some dates on the calender for stock study groups. We got a lot done in the three hours that we were together for the meeting.

You know what, if your are interested in learning how to start your own investment club, subscribe to my FREE monthly Journal! I will share how to to things like this in my publication!


Jules

"Join hundreds of other women who are moving in new directions!"

With the New Year ahead most of us make new resolutions and set new goals. I am certainly doing that! I love this feeling of reflecting on the past year and bringing it to a close. Then, I ambitiously make new plans for the coming year and set new goals. One of my projects is to create a FREE monthly Journal where you will find articles, tips, stories and more about women and how they manage finances, hold successful careers, nurture and raise healthy families, keep themselves healthy too, find time to socialize with friends, keep the fire in intimate relations and devote time to important causes in their communities -- "how we balance it all".

How to do YOU balance it all? I bet you are closer than you think, but if you are not sure, my FREE monthly Journal will show you how I am doing it and how others do it too! So join my community of women who want to focus on one or more of these areas in their lives during the New Year to come. Sign up for my FREE monthly Journal!

My other aim for the New Year is to share my expertise on budgeting (dry boring word - maybe you can help me come up with a new word) and teach workshops on streamlining household cash flow. I can see a demand for this with the changing economy. And I am writing a book somewhere in all of this too!

How about you? What’s important in your life? Which areas of your life will you be focused on in the new year ahead? I would love to know!!

Please participate in the poll on the right column of the blog page and share with me.

Warmly,
Jules

A Quote for Today: January

"If you do not see great riches in your imagination,
you will never see them in your bank balance".
~Napoleon Hill